Herman Cain almost had me...

Herman Cain has intrigued me since he hit the campaign trail.  He is a successful businessman who has a degree in math.  That alone is a major point for him in my book.  He supports wiping out the vast and confusing quagmire that is the US tax code with a flat tax.  Another point.  Then we get to the part about "advancing to the Fair Tax".  Now you've lost me. 

You see, I have a simple view of a flat tax.  One tax rate for all, no exceptions.  None.  It hits everyone just as hard.  My hope for the 999 plan was this:
9% tax on gross income for all businesses after paying their employees.
9% tax on gross income for individuals.
9% sales tax.

Herman Cain's plan initially appears this simple.  However, I noticed that interspersed in the Cain explanation were a number of qualifiers, all of which make it no longer a flat tax.  Businesses still have deductions that they can qualify for, so the gray areas then open up.  I guess the tax preparers needed to be thrown a bone.  Additionally, we have "Empowerment Zones" for more deductions, both personal and business.  More gray area, even more vaguely defined.  And I see no actual explanation of the "Fair Tax", which I am led to believe would be similar to the VAT so popular in the Euro Zone, which right now is such a high symbol of fiscal responsibility.

I have been a fan of flat tax since I have had to pay taxes.  I have noticed one thing in all discussions.  The idea is great, a simple plan based on basic math.  Then it gets complicated because the people in the discussion forget the "flat" part of flat tax.  Normally the first item thrown out there is Capitol Investment.  From there we hit on charitable contributions and eventually we are circling the drain while discussing carbon footprint taxes and value added tax.  Then we have the issue of Federal vs State Vs Local. 

I call bullshit on all of them.  Do you know how I am sure that a simple flat tax with no special rules or exceptions will work?  Nobody will be entirely happy, but nobody will be completely screwed.  I prefer the following plan:

10% Federal tax on gross income for all businesses after paying their employees.
10% Federal tax on gross income for individuals.
4% Federal sales tax.

5% State tax on gross income for all businesses after paying their employees.
5% State tax on gross income for individuals.
3% State sales tax.

2% Local tax on gross income for all businesses after paying their employees.
2% Local tax on gross income for individuals.
1% Local sales tax.

Edit: Forgot to add the total lines: 
Business - 17% tax on gross income after paying employees.
Individuals - 17% tax on gross income.
Sales Tax - 7% on all goods and services.
And we finish by removing all other taxes.  Where did the numbers come from?  My ass, really, but I can't do any worse than the people we have elected already.  Going on this plan, I would pay over 50% less in taxes overall.  The trick would be getting those we elect to actually learn how to balance a checkbook and not pour money down a bottomless hole.